Mayonnaise

it's summertime - and the livin is easy

2008-07-08T04:33:00.000-07:00

In the domain of life, insects exemplify the miracle of DNA and its' combinatorial permutations. With the exception of single-cellular organisms, insects can be said to be the masters of this planet. This all comes as unfortunate news to me because I hate insects. They have been nothing but a pain in my ass and other anatomical outposts since I was old enough to be aware that they were in fact not tooth fairies (another reason why I still dislike them).

Because I claim broad ignorance on the effects of insect territories by human developmental expansion I'm going to name drop my buddy Peter Buckland of the National Center for Atmospheric Research who issued a report recently on the effects of global warming and its' potential impact on the near future in the United States. Very long story short, he says even if we were to completely halt our production of oil-based carbon output, we would still see the escalating effects of global warming over the next 50 years from currently trapped heat in the atmosphere and Oceans. One of the many visible consequences of this would be insect outbreaks outside forested areas due to a mitigation of naturally colder temperatures, the annual insect veto if you will. Let me remind you, this will still happen if we significantly curtail C02 emissions. This really concerns me as someone who already feels that their personal space in the past year has been breached by nearly every member of every species of insect living near and not so near to me.

With all the hullabaloo kicked up by celebrity types from Brad Pitt to Laurie David, you would think the NASCAR dads and science fair moms would have been mobilized to pressure their representatives to act swiftly. Alas, taking the historical precedent of nationwide apathy towards Maragaret Fuller's campaign to reduce R.E. Emerson's methane emissions we all should have known better. Compounding the problems with legislative haste, the leaders at the G-8 summit today announced to reduce C02 emissions in half by 2050 at the earliest. By that time I'll already have to claim 5 different species of insect dependents on my New World Order tax form.

The Late Greats

2008-07-07T06:18:00.000-07:00

I am trying to get back into blogging as a mental exercise. I realized that limiting my content to food limits my range as a writer to poorly emulating the incomparable Frank Bruni. With the freedom to discuss anything I can start work on emulating the categorically comparable Bill Bryson. That guy really talked about everything. Unfortunately, with the universe open for mining I'm having difficulty grabbing a purchase on anything interesting right now.

2008-04-16T04:49:00.002-07:00

04/17/08

My internet at home is on the fritz so please bear with me until then. For the few people who do read this, thank you for checking back and I promise i'll a) start cooking more b)clean up my kitchen c) start posting to this more.

The incredible edible egg

2008-04-01T09:52:00.000-07:00

03-31-08

Ajay was here this past weekend (which means its okay to come visit sometime!!) and I was able to succesfully open the big daddy jug of olive oil a teacher sold me. A good weekend.

Kaboom-boom!

2008-03-26T09:22:00.000-07:00

03-26-08

I almost wasn't going to document this army ration meal until i remembered the little boy from born into brothels who when showing his gripping snapshots of slumlife in India says: "it's not beautiful, but you have to look at it because it is truth."

HoneyBear

2008-03-26T05:28:00.000-07:00

03-26-08

Who knew I was like Eric Ripert

you're blues aint like my blues

2008-03-24T11:38:00.000-07:00

03-23-04

Like the pictures themselves, the meal was off the mark by an inch. The culprit being perhaps an undersalting and the unvailability of mutant year round ginger.

2007-12-15T02:44:00.000-08:00

12/13/07

Amman may not be known to the general population for its' cheddar cheese and salami, but what makes the ancient city so great may also turn out to be its' best kept secret.

2007-12-15T02:41:00.000-08:00

12/10/07

"There's so much less to this than you think"

2007-12-15T02:38:00.000-08:00

12/5/07

the same old haunts

2007-12-02T04:15:00.001-08:00

11/30/01

speak to me in a language I can hear

2007-12-02T04:10:00.001-08:00

11/25/07

speak to me in a language I can hear

2007-12-02T04:10:00.000-08:00

alan parsons in a winter wonderland

2007-12-02T04:04:00.000-08:00

11/23/2007

It's officially winter and it's also my first real winter since living in Ohio. Leaving the house is understandably harder to do so I'm finding ways to make stews out of anything. Today I made a vegetable soup that I'm proud to claim as my own creation. What I'm most proud of is the nearly flawless pot of rice I cooked.

hooked on a feelin'

2007-11-10T00:48:00.001-08:00

11-7-07

RED! + KNIFE!

99 Problems

2007-11-10T00:45:00.000-08:00

11-5-07

This is what I like to call my dinner mixed tape

Blonde on Blonde

2007-11-10T00:42:00.000-08:00

11-3-07

Get Real Paid

2007-11-10T00:33:00.000-08:00

10-30-07

I went shopping three days ago to buy ingredients to make chili and in the process bought a few other ingredients I thought I could make a quick meal with before I treat myself to chili on Thursday. So aftere trying to recal memories of my mothers cooking and a brief instructional conversation with Neela I made a very simple potato curry. There are two different versions of the curry shown in the picture, the major difference being the pans used and as a result the time course of the heat on the food. The stainless steel pan version on the right didn't burn the onions and garlic as much as the non-stick pan version on the left did. Would the onions have burned if I'd used less and added the potatoes sooner; or is it mostly a matter of tempering the flame and having better control of the heat? Of course it's a bit of both. The thought process behind the creation of the flavor profile was brief but it tasted good enough to put off the study of seasoning for another day

dark green enough to be blue

2007-10-24T23:40:00.000-07:00

10/18/07
10/21/07
10/24/07

My batteries died right after the flash went off so unfortunately I don't have a photograph of the meal prepared or the company I enjoyed. However, I think this picture captures nearly everything. Since I have yet to buy new batteries, I'll take this time to reflect.
Previous attempts of mine at reaching an understanding of my obsession with food turn up a recondite mish-mash of vineyard imagery and burrito cravings. I would accept this as some evolved adipocyte-ID synergy, but I went to college so I know better. Like all phenomena, the root cause is far more complex and at this stage in my life hindsight is too muddled by the mischief of memory. Although I have salvaged some vivid recollections of being a schoolboy in India and eagerly awaiting a school holiday so I could watch Yan Can Cook< which aired on weekdays during school hours. Also, The Boxcar Children series largely appealed to me because of its' devotion to the diet of those orphaned youth. Seriously, go back and check those books out. These two memories however fall on the timeline after the illusive germinal experience that shaped my obsession.

2007-10-18T04:11:00.000-07:00

10-15-07

For the first time in a long time I can feel the surface of my ribs tucked tightly underneath my skin, the contours of my torso no longer a part of a once familiar landscape causing to swell lingering tides of homesickness.

Coffee Cantata

2007-10-07T04:10:00.000-07:00

As hard as it is to imagine that first instance of a wandering primitive yuppie taking in the aroma of a sun-drenched coffee plant then accidentally spilling his hot water supply on the plant, then slipping on a baby dinosaur under said plant only to have the new coffee solution fall on his tongue, it is easy to comprehend the beverages subsequent meteoric rise to global fame. When I woke up this morning realizing that all I had in my house was a frozen cucumber and some finely ground coffee beans, I didn't descend into abject despair. No, I immediately flipped the switch to off on my long term survival machinery and embraced the short-term reward of a decadently sweet and potent mug of turkish coffee. The next three hours were ripe with coffee daydreams of great deeds to be done and of course the writeup of those deeds and their feerless visionary in Time Magazine.
Now that the KOFFEE KRAZIES are winding down, in favor of more reasoned judgement I have decided to contract out my plans to allow for more august pursuits like finding a spot INSIDE my house that can not be seen from OUTSIDE my house.

pattern against user

2007-10-05T04:36:00.001-07:00

10/03/07

Thie pictures represent a stalemate in my creative abilities to teach, to cook, and to write

at every occasion I am ready for a funeral

2007-10-05T04:27:00.000-07:00

10/02/07

This is my culinary protest to a day that started like a dream and ended like a dream tarred, feathered, and nailed to the cross. It wasn't that bad of a day. I just felt my blog was missing references to ancient roman execution methods. The picture is also posted sideways to challenge your institutionalized pro-establishment visual paradigm.

2007-10-05T04:21:00.000-07:00

9/30/07

This meal represents a personal triumph. I had just come back from Ajloun and after a day of fasting all I wanted was to line my teeth with peanut butter before shoving my face into the bag of fresh hubez. However, a rare night of restraint led me to actually scramble some eggs and cut up a cucumber I bought the day before. The darker green areas on the cucumber that are not the skin are frozen due to the proximity of every point in my fridge to the freezer. The red chili sauce on top of the eggs served an aesthetic purpose which i'm sure you see. right?

xXxOne Armed ScissorxXx

2007-10-05T04:06:00.000-07:00

9/28/07

The knife I used to cut the potatoes cost me 10 girsch which most likely comes from the shipping cost from China to Jordan. I was certain it would break while cutting the onions and potatoes but China being a resilient nation transferred the attribute to their exported knives. The hardest part about this dish was knowing when the potatoes would be completely cooked through, so a lot of sampling eventually ruined my appetite. The green in the picture comes from leftover green bellpeppers in my fridge. Per a teachers recommendations I cracked two eggs over all this which I can predict will become a theme for all my subsequent dishes until I can expand my culinary repertoire.

Wanderlust

2007-10-03T04:06:00.000-07:00

I'm dedicating a part of my time from these next two years to cataloging all meals prepared personally in my kitchen. As of now my kitchen contains the following items:

2 plates
2 small knives
1 drying rack
12 spoons
1 fridge
1 pot
1 pan
2 tea kettles
1 cutting board + veggie strainer
1 plastic spatula
1 coffee pot (a breeg)
sugar, salt, and pepper
soybean oil and vegetable oil

Since I'm starting this a week after I prepared my first meals let me catch you up. The first night that I actually had cooking supplies and food I made a jordanian dish called Galiyat Bandora which is stewed tomatoes with green peppers. It sufficed as a source of calories for two days but not much else.

side with the seeds

2007-06-13T13:14:00.000-07:00

"Do I contradict myself? Very well, then I contradict myself, I am large, I contain multitudes." - Walt Whitman

This is a picture of a chocolate bread pudding I made yesterday with Jimmy, Sean, and Rowan. I used a recipe by Paula Deen.